You know, I’ve realized something important about myself: There are two things I absolutely cannot stand — greed and lying.
Which is unfortunate, because every time I turn on the TV, it’s like watching a live‑action nature documentary about both.
Greed is out here strutting across the screen like it’s auditioning for RuPaul’s Drag Race: “Category is… Corporate Excess Realness!” And the judges are like, “Shantay, you stay — and also stay in power forever.”
Meanwhile lying is doing backflips in the background like it’s trying to win America’s Got Talent: “Tonight’s act: a politician claiming they’ve never met the person they were photographed hugging for 12 minutes straight.”
I swear, half the news feels like a crossover episode between The Twilight Zone and The Real Housewives of Whatever City Has the Most Lobbyists.
And don’t even get me started on government press conferences. It’s like watching a group project where nobody did the homework, but everyone is confidently presenting their section anyway.
Greed: “I deserve more.” Lying: “I did nothing wrong.” Me: “I just wanted to watch a cooking show.”
Honestly, at this point, my spirit animal — the emotional frog — is sitting on the couch with me, clutching a tiny remote, whispering: “Turn it off, babe… we’re not spiritually strong enough for this.”
But hey, at least it’s consistent. If you ever feel lost, confused, or unsure what’s happening in the world, just remember: Greed and lying will ALWAYS be there, doing their little dance routine on TV like they’re trying to win a trophy.
And somehow… they usually do.